Lady Parts

Traveling is all about new experiences.  Today I went to the doctor for the first time in a foreign country, but not just any doctor.  It was time for my lady parts annual check-up with the gynecologist.  Again, my Georgia Peach guardian angel, Kristi set up an appointment for me with her doctor who speaks fairly good English.

I decided to walk in lieu of taking the bus.  The rain had ceased and the sun was shining so  I wanted to take advantage and enjoy a brisk morning walk. I found the doctor’s building just fine, but had trouble locating her office.  I was told she practiced on level one.  I’ve learned that level one here is actually what we’d consider the second floor of any building in the United States.  The first floor of a building here is marked with a T for terra (ground).  Upon entering the office building I climbed the first set of stairs on the left and looked at all of the doors, not finding Dr. Canedi’s office.  I walked back down the stairs to the lobby and discovered a second set of stairs on the opposite side of the corridor.  I climbed those, still not discovering the doctor’s office.  I was confused and now late.

Perhaps knowing what level one means in the U.S., Kristi meant her office was on level T.  I searched around, not finding the office.  I started over.  I climbed the staircase to the left and continued up an additional flight, now on what I considered to be the third floor.  I found her!  At this point, I was not only late, but sweating like a whore in church.

The doctor welcomed me into her office with a smile as I began peeling off my layers – hat, gloves, scarf, coat and sweater.  I sat down trying to cool off and gazed around at my surroundings.  The room was painted a soft yellow with nothing but a basic calendar decorating the walls.  Dr. Canedi’s office contained both her desk and exam table and she had no nurse or office assistant.  Things appeared to be clean and simple.

We had a brief discussion and she instructed me to have a seat on the exam table.  I did as I was told, thinking she was going to take my blood pressure, temperature, etc.  Instead she told me to take off my pants and undergarments.  Okay, sure.  That makes sense.  I sat for a moment waiting for her to hand me a gown and step out of the room.  Instead, she stayed seated at her desk.  Luckily, playing organized sports in junior high, high school and college cures you of any modesty.  I dropped trou and she scooted a chair over for me to lay my jeggings and panties on.  I stood there naked from the waste down, slightly amused at the completely opposite experience I was having from my exam a year ago at Dr. Chouteau’s office in Austin, TX.  I held back a giggle as I thought of myself as a fly on that bare yellow wall taking in the site of my bare ass standing in front of a stranger.

The rest of the exam was routinely unpleasant – I don’t know a woman that enjoys the experience – and then I got dressed while she sat back down at her desk.  Since the results of my exam will arrive in the post (and in Italian), we went over the form I’ll receive.  She was friendly, kind and thorough and it cost me 95 euro – a bargain by American healthcare standards for someone without health insurance.  And, my birth control for six months costs the equivalent of a one month’s supply in the U.S.  That alone makes you want to go out and have sex to celebrate!

Dr. Canedi didn’t have a staff of people running around, there weren’t plush couches in the waiting room or music being piped through a sound system, there was no art on the walls or posters mounted to the ceiling to give me something to focus on while I laid propped up awkwardly in the stirrups.  It was far from superfluous.   But, I’ll take this no frills approach to quality healthcare any day.

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